


Promise?

by orphan_account



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, hxh universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:14:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25499665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: You're tired of Hisoka treating your relationship like a game and confront him about it.
Relationships: Hisoka (Hunter x Hunter)/Reader
Comments: 8
Kudos: 193





	Promise?

There was a point in your life where you were insistent you would not fall for Hisoka’s traps or humor his minor games. When you first met him, his gold eyes taunted you, invitations to kill him slipped from his lips that were always curled into a smug smirk. You would not give him the gratification of pushing all your buttons and letting him absorb all your attention. He became present in the back of your mind at all times and your thoughts wandered to him. It was his plan and you didn’t like that you fell into it but soon, the point of not falling for his traps and games disappeared.

You remained stuck in his clutches and hungry for him to throw you a bone your way, deem you important enough to fight, or at least consider you an ally. It wasn’t the best time since he never lived up to your expectations, but a crumb was better than nothing at all. His games became your games. You would hide from him in hopes that he’d try to find you. In the beginning, he never sought you out and it was always you finding him. Then something changed. Something changed in your game where he would make it a point to find you if you left for longer than a few weeks. After a few months of playing hide and seek with you, the gap of time between when you left for him to find you would close. He had convinced you to stay by his side.

Hisoka never told you why he didn’t like it when you went far, but you could tell it was never because he was clingy. He enjoyed having his own space for the day and would always come back to you at night, vaguely recounting the events of his day. He’d ask you to play with his soft red hair after he showered, golden eyes observing you as you recounted your day. You weren’t sure why he always wanted you around. There were no games to play unless he pushed your buttons to see you lash out, smiling smugly at your reaction as he chided you for being so hot-headed.

The motives didn’t flesh out until you realized you needed him. Hisoka leaving you behind made you nervous that you were vulnerable without him. Expressing this to him made him smile faintly, a genuine one that didn’t make you feel like the target of his taunting or games.

“[Name], I’ll always come back to you. I thought you were smart enough to know by now,” he muttered, tipping your chin up with his index finger.

You believed him. You had no reason not to since he  _ did _ always come back to you and you always came back to him.

It took a few months for the relationship to slip into a label. Hisoka always pushed your buttons to rile you up and you levelled him out because he needed it, but something was always missing. You were always left feeling exhausted, even now.

Hisoka broke every promise he made to you. He always took and never gave back. His only exception was that he always came back to you. There was no emotional validation for you, no security besides physical security. There was nothing there besides Hisoka offering a warm bed to sleep in and his laughter filling your ears once your cheeks flush red with annoyance. You watch him now, shirtless on the bed as he scrolls through his phone with vague interest. Even now, you couldn’t ask him to tell you what he likes about you or to make a promise to spend the day with you tomorrow. He couldn’t do either.

Nothing is making you stay with him. You’re strong enough to fight any nen user on your own. You can start over, forget about Hisoka. Forget about the warmth of his lap and the way his eyes watch you closely as you draw a pink star and blue tear on his face. You can rid the way his hands held your hips tight, nails scratching against your bare skin as he would whisper against the shell of your ear how you’re his. You felt like you wouldn’t have a home if you couldn’t feel the familiar curve of his lips against yours that would never give you a full kiss at first, always teasing until you’d have to meet him the rest of the way.

He hurts you. Everything he does that doesn’t meet you halfway or makes you feel like he just keeps you around to play with sets you on fire from the inside out. Yet you find your face pressed against his chest every night.

“Love.” His voice snaps you out of it, making you blink at him a few times as he smiles at you.

“Hisoka?” you sigh out, pushing your hair away from your face as you turn around to head back to the walk-in closet. You had some errands to run today— things Hisoka promised to get around to but never did.

“What were you thinking about? You stared at me for some time,” he mumbles, footsteps padding towards you as the weight of his hands rest on your waist.

You pull a black sweatshirt off a hanger, holding it to your chest as you shrug your shoulders.

“Thinking about you,” you reply, your voice even quieter than before.

Hisoka hums, his hands pushing up the fabric of your pajama shirt to rest his hands against your skin. Gooseflesh prickles your skin and you shiver a bit, pressing your back to his chest as he leans down to press soft kisses behind your ear.

“What about me? It didn’t look too fond.” He hums in between each kiss and you hate how well he could read you. Still, you feign stupidity and lean into the kisses.

“How would you know that?”

He chuckles softly against your ear and turns you around to face him. Your eyes meet his as he stares into yours. They look serious, and you know it upsets him that you weren’t being upfront with him. He doesn’t deserve the honesty since he wasn’t honest with you about how he spends his days, how he’ll make time for you, how he’ll do things for you or make you feel special.

You deserve to be honest, you deserve  _ honesty _ and you deserve to have validation. If you can’t receive any results, you wouldn’t entertain Hisoka and his games anymore.

“You’re an open book, [Name]. I can tell when you’re thinking of me positively or negatively. I despise when you play stupid to avoid conversations,” he chides playfully.

“I despise every promise you break to me about how you will make time for me. You won’t tell me anything about your past so I can understand you, and you don’t help me when I’m sad. We have nothing besides you protecting me with brute strength and physical touch. You take everything I have and leave me exhausted with nothing from you in return,” you rant and shove him off of you, promptly exiting the closet afterwards.

You take off your pajama shirt, slipping on the sweatshirt as you move to the body mirror propped against the wall to fix your hair with your fingers. It’s the longest time Hisoka has ever been silent in the entire time he’s known you. You could see his reflection in the mirror where he leans against the closet door and watches you. His facial expressions are unreadable and it upsets you. He could tell when you were thinking of him with nothing but the highest admiration and all you could see is when he feels bloodlust.

“How long were you holding that in?” he asks, keeping his distance. You sigh, turning around and holding onto the sweatshirt nervously.

“A while. Why do you keep me so far away from you?” Hurt seeps into your voice, eyes burning with unshed tears that you rapidly blinked out of your eyes.

Hisoka doesn’t deserve to see you cry, and you refuse to allow him to see how much it hurt you that he kept you so far. He’s the closest person you’ve ever been with but he’s a mystery. He wants nothing to do with getting to know you; he wants you to not know him. Hisoka only wants you in his bed, in his arms, kissing him, on his lap, with him eating breakfast, the one he talks about his days to. He can’t keep a promise to spend one dinner with you, but he wants you close.

You aren’t sure if the need to be the one always hurting someone comes from the power play he has in fights. He needs to be the one with the upper hand and you’re not sure whether or not it’s true. You can only theorize.

“Do you need me to be close to you? Do you need me? I wasn’t aware you needed me so badly, my [Name],” he teases, making you sigh out in frustration as your eyes begin to water.

You look down at the floor, tears finally falling down your cheeks. Once you felt his hand rest on your hip, you shoved him away from you. Tearfully, you lift your head back up again to face him, his teasing smile fading into a concerned expression.

“I’m not a game, Hisoka. You keep me so far from you when I want you close to me. I want us to spend days together instead of nights where you hold me. I want you to tell me about you and why you’re the way you are. I want to understand and learn everything about you. I want you to understand and learn everything about me! I want you to love me, how I love you is that so hard? I can’t do this anymore!” 

You hate being so emotional, but you spent a year and a half dealing with Hisoka keeping you so far and leaving you emotionally unsatisfied. It hurts more having it perceived as a little joke. He needs to understand your hurt; he needs to know you would not do this anymore. You couldn’t even tell what he was thinking, but you could see the itch to reach out and touch your face. His gaze focuses more on your tears and the hurt in them. The remorse in his face takes shape.

“You aren’t a game to me, [Name]. I’m afraid I don’t know how to explain myself properly. I can’t give you the answer to why I am the way I am. I can tell you I’m offering my deepest apologies to you for breaking promises and not allowing you to see who I am. I’m not the most emotional person, but I promised you I’d always come back to you. Seeing you at the end of my endless days means more to me than I can express, love,” Hisoka says genuinely and gently pulls you close to his chest once your guard is down.

He isn’t the most emotional person and he admits he can’t express himself. You let out a faint sigh as your hands rested on his chest, fingers tracing shapes as you sniffled softly. You could be patient with Hisoka if he offered to meet you halfway and keep that promise.

“Would you make me a promise that you’d uphold the same importance of coming back to me?” Your voice is muffled and small against his chest, but you don’t want to leave the security of his arms.

“Anything if it means I won’t have to chase you around and win you back with another one of my ploys,” he mumbles out half-heartedly, fingers running through your hair.

It’s strange to see Hisoka fearful of something— fearful of _ losing you _ . You always did the chasing, you always tried to open him and yourself up, you always asked, you always gave, you’re always scared he didn’t feel the feelings you felt. Now, you could hear the genuine emotion in his voice, and it’s the closest to fear he’ll get.

“Would you promise to try? I’m only asking you to make time for me and opening up will come as you finally break the barrier and try to be with me. I  _ need _ you,” you whisper, feeling the warmth of his hand cup your cheek to brush your tears away with his thumb.

“I promise, I’ll try to be with you. I need you,” he whispers back, leaning down to brush his lips over yours before pressing them together.

He doesn’t tease this time. He leads into the kiss just how you like them. Soft, but with a roughness to it that gave a bit of meaning. The passion from Hisoka, it’s a way of signing off his promise with his signature. Your lips briefly move against one another with you standing on your tiptoes to get better leverage, making him chuckle faintly into the kiss. He pulled back a few seconds after, hands sliding down the slope of your spine to rest against the small of your back.

“You’re so dramatic, love. You could’ve told me that anytime and spared the waterworks. An easy fix for us, don’t you think?” he teases, laughing through each word as your beaming face turns into a playful glare.

“Didn’t you do an entire magic show about your decapitated arm?” You giggle, watching his face light up with you, playing along with his jokes.

“Ah ah ah, that’s theatrics.  _ You’re _ dramatic,” he corrects, his smile turning into a smirk before leaning in once more to peck your lips a few times.

“Will you stay with me tomorrow?” you ask him, lowering yourself on your flat feet but staying pressed to his chest.

“I will,” he promises, and for once, you feel like he’d keep it.

**Author's Note:**

> my tumblr is gurensichinose if you'd like to interact there!
> 
> i plan to write a hisoka chaptered fic soon so just keep ur eyes peeled.


End file.
